Gratitude by Sandy Bywater

I’m grateful for so many things in my life. I used to be a person who looked at the glass as half empty with a negative attitude towards life. My past conditioning led me to view life as a struggle and no matter what I would never come out on top. Too many things were against me and it would always turn out that way. I realised now that most of the time I was depressed.

One of the things that changed that view was I walked through the doors of the Nottingham Buddhist Centre one January evening to start an Introductory course in meditation. I was warmly welcomed and somehow I kept coming back every week to learn more. It was hard at first because I came by myself feeling shy and unconfident. It took courage for me to keep showing up which was made easier by the way I was made to feel welcomed and accepted. Now  I can identify with people who walk through the door for the first time how important it is to be made welcome. I am grateful to Jinaraja, Arthabandhu, Paraga and Sanghaketu who were the Order members at this time. They helped and supported me to come along to Sangha night and to go on their weekend retreats. They invited me to ‘spud nights’ and gradually I started to get to know people in the Sangha and eventually they have become my friends.

Now I can’t imagine a life without Buddhism and our centre.

I appreciate the friendships I’ve made. I appreciate honesty and skilful conversation. I appreciate the support in study and support I’m receiving now I’ve asked for ordination. Over the years my friendships have deepened into genuine friendship and I care and support in return. I love spending time with the Sangha and being on retreat. I have grown in so many ways and I’m grateful for honest feedback as I stretch out into unknown territory.

I want to give back. I love making the shrines at our Centre it’s an expression of my gratitude and faith. I think our Buddha is approachable, looks human, western and relatable. I love to have a shrine that has extra oomph for celebrations and inspires. I love being part of the festival team and shaping how our celebrations can be inclusive and celebratory with joyful Mitra ceremonies.

Buddha Day Shrine at the Nottingham Buddhist Centre May 2019

This weekend I would have been part of the team decorating the Centre for our festivities. We would be dressing the shrine and putting in place some special elements that would be unveiled on Buddha Day. These are now shelved for sometime in the future. But we can still come together via the miracle of Zoom and YouTube. We can share the day with meditation and puja. We can share online and celebrate together in a different way.

I’m grateful to our lovely Order members who are working hard to keep the show on the road. I am grateful for the Sangha that is supporting this and for just being there.  I am grateful for my practice and faith - it gives me context and shapes the way I live my life. I’m grateful for the friendships that are sustaining me enabling and me to grow. I’m grateful to Sangharakshita who started the Movement that showed me the way and turned on the lights.

Sandy Bywater

Outdoor Shrine at Bestwood Park Buddha Day May 2019

Gathering for the Dawn Chorus Walk at Bestwood Park Buddha Day May 2019